A No Good, Very Bad Day.

Unfortunately guys, today had many more dark spots than light ones. I was almost in tears at one point in the day- it just seemed like a situation, much like a boulder down a hill, where once things started, they couldn't be stopped.
We transitioned to a new schedule this week- instead of block scheduling, we see the kids everday, for 50 minutes (40 on Wednesday). This has caused great confusion, and in my opinion, tires the kids out mentally a lot more than the previous schedule. Anyway, I digress.

This morning started fine. I had Jeopardy planned for today, figuring that not only would it be a great review of material, it would be entertaining enough that the lure of the weekend might not impede upon my students' abilities to focus. I was sort of right.
The first period of my day was 6th period. They are usually rowdy, but manageable, and there are a few students in there that are my absolute favorites, like Siaki, who is undeniably one of the cool kids, but is also respectful to me, can sing like an angel, and is nice to his classmates, or Villiam, who is incredibly smart, remembers everything I tell him, and has the cutest baby-face in the world. Jeopardy went well- the teams competed, they got some energy out, the questions were answered. Success. I gave them the last two minutes of class to relax while I tallied the score, and during that time, the unthinkable (to me) happened. Two of my kids in the back, out of nowhere, got into an all out fight- fists flying, yelling, tension everywhere. Luckily all the boys in the back jumped in pretty quickly to pull them apart, but I was still shaken, and I was dreading what I knew I would have to do: take the boys to the office. Essentially, I would have to condemn my students to either a beating from a member of the school administration, or one from their parents at home, which is not something which weighs lightly on my conscience. However, there are certain protocols and rules in school which cannot be broken, and fighting in class is one of them.

No more fistfights occurred, which is the only thing that probably saved what little shred of sanity I had left, but the rest of the day proved just as disheartening. With the exception of my fourth period class (and my sixth), none of the students seemed to have retained anything that I had taught them. They would blindly yell out words as they glanced through the notes, or just sit there, looking at me as if I were expecting the impossible.
Maybe I was. I am trying to get these kids to learn in a way that they have been unaccustomed to from grades 1-8. They are not fluent in English, and yet I am expecting them to understand and apply words like homogenous and flammable.

I know I need to adjust my own expectations- both of my students and of myself as a teacher, but as I found out, that process can be incredibly painful.

A little bummed,
Rosa